The other morning Mrs. T and I had a ‘difference’ about some insignificant thing, at the time it was not as insignificant as I hopped in the shower, got dressed and went to see a man about a horse. I honestly do not remember what the thing was, I do however remember thinking that most of us operate under the assumption that our way of doing life is mostly correct, and others’ ways are varying degrees of wrong.
Read MoreLast week I mentioned that there were times where I feel extreme loneliness and being unable to effectively communicate what it feels like in words and y’all came to check on me.
I’m good.
It was 65 percent observational and 34.99 percent personal, I’m so good at math. Observed through random conversations about nothing and yet everything. It’s important to define loneliness as a subjective indicator offeeling alone; an inconsistency between an actual level of connection and a desired level of connection where the desired level varies between different people.
“We can be lonely but not alone, and we can be alone but not lonely”
Science.
Read MoreAt age five my family moved into the home my parents own today. We had a dog, he had his own house outside. Only time I remember him coming inside was during a snow storm. I grew up in Virginia so I’m not speaking of regular, two hour school delay snow, because even then he was outside in his dog house. This was a storm with frigid temperatures and the only time I remember him coming inside...
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" Today's word is ANOTHER. You are successful but have you helped someone else up the ladder with you? Is there someone you could mentor? Find time to help another ... "
~Leslie Tramuel
Alright here we are … As many of you may know {because you care} I’ve seriously given consideration to deleting my Facebook account. Conversations directly & indirectly related to it’s destruction have caused me to have a discussion, albeit with myself, valid exploration.
I tried to ask myself why without offense but naturally I viewed this as an attack & had to defend my position.
Likes & {Dis}Likes in the same breath
I like the fact that social media presents an opportunity for personal & business relationships. I dislike the fact that social media presents an opportunity for personal & business relationships.
Of Likes
Twitter, Facebook, WordPress & the count(ed) number of networking tools that I use have my attention, but not because of some addiction {crack is whack} but because they provide value. I’m able to stay in contact with work friends as we move into different roles & drop a dime on em’ when they call out sick but update their status with “Having fun at the beach! bea(ot)ches!” It also enables discovery, I’ve found many interesting sites that challenge me & inspire my own creativity. I’ve also met very interesting people with whom I’ve been able to engage in mentally stimulating conversations & very silly & fun conversations.
Of {Dis}Likes
In trying to build a network I was guilty of friend hoarding {in the beginning} accepting every request from old classmate(s), every request from local promoter(s), every request for business page(s) There was no way for me to be engaged with so many. I’m pretty introverted & never really post to Facebook that often, however the apps I use provide constant access to my time line so I’m able to see what others are posting … I’ll just say I’d rather be a good “friend” to a few than dis-connected from so many.
Save Deletion | Destroy & Rebuild
Destroy: Transitive and intransitive verb to ruin something or make something useless.
Rebuild: 1To work to restore something that has been weakened, damaged or ruined 2To make major alterations or improvements to something.
My plan is to destroy & rebuild … this is how I will continue to use Social Media & Facebook:
To have fun, To “Hip” others - make aware of and influence by the thoughts and ideas based on social, economic and cultural background, For Empowerment, To share news & post information for events, To meet other folk with brains, {I is intelligent too} … Hopefully this will spark a thought, a thought will spark a conversation, a conversation will spark a debate, a debate will spark some fun. Slingshot engaged.
Harm None,
Mr.TramueL is the only person to ever ace a Rorschach Test.
Not So Random Chick: “Mr.TramueL I’m through! What’s the best way to tell him it’s over?”
*Flashback* To the best way I’ve never been dumped. Okay, check.
Mr.TramueL: “I think you should do it during the day, preferably during lunch, in a crowded place, drive separate cars and give the speech after you eat. {I was mad hungry and wasn’t so lucky, the death grip to my testicles was delivered before the meal!} … so don’t be cruel Bobby Brown, let them enjoy that last meal.
I’m not a real therapist, but I play a representative of advice & counsel in real life. Two separate and unrelated conversations prompted me to write. One up top and …
Not So Random Dude: “Mr.TramueL I met you how long ago?” “You don’t have somebody you seeing?” “You still doing that five year and out isht?” {All rhetorical I assume ‘cause he didn’t allow me to respond}
Mr.TramueL: *Blank Stare. Blink.Blink*
The Detached Observer
Background of Not So Random Chick is that she allowed a man to take up residence literally and figuratively while he struggled with employment, child support and “mother of his child” issues. All the while she is holding down the fort without asking him for nay thing’
Not So Random Dude would go on to say that life is too short for any man to spend without a special someone in their life. The dichotomy between the two situations is need. As much as a woman needs to feel she is loved, a man needs to know he is needed|respected. For a man it can be emasculating when he “feels” that he is not respected or needed. I said feel. {Ya’ll are tuff}
Naturally she called bullisht, but I explained that I wasn’t offering an excuse … I mean she asked me "Why is he showing out?" Mr.TramueL’s Observation: Although she expressed love by taking care of him, supporting him and giving him the bizness, in his mind he feels that she didn’t meet or fulfill the “need” of being needed. He probably went somewhere to play captain save-a-hoe.
Experiential Schooling,
Mr. “I might catch some heat over this” TramueL
My writing process is generally born from my observations of the world around me, life and all of it’s ironic twist. Often transcribed as my attempt at levity of any given situation. I use wit and sarcasm to fulfill a psychological need (fantasy) because my will is directed inwards, often times I try to find a path for it, a path that will allow me to "get away from it all" at least some of the time. T(!)his is generally why I go way off into left field of the point I want to make in my post sometimes most times, so today I’m going to give it to you up front. The point that is. Bad Boy Baby #TakeThatTakeThat
My observations may appear as sharp, insulting or that I’m making light of a particular situation. When in reality I’m trying to assign meaning to what others might consider "ordinary" events. It is so completely natural for me to accept that there is more to the world than what is before my eyes.
“Team of Me” – The Point
I’m not a do-gooder nor am I a law-breaker. However, I’m not afraid of the "dark side" of human nature and will bend the rules from time to time if needed. I’m an introvert and it is more apparent to me now more than ever. Via forbes.com … Thinking first and talking later (Check), focus on depth (Check), exude calm (Check), prefer writing to talking (Check), embrace solitude (Check). It’s a gift and an “opportunity” for me when it relates to …
Friendship
The Gift: I’m a giver & usually quick to help others, not only with er’day common task such as help with a move, sharing information & taking yo’ mama to the store, but also on a spiritual or psychological level.
The Opportunity: To counsel using God’s word. What I’ve found is that most of my thinking is related to HIM, I just never give HIM credit. Thus …
Spiritual Growth
The Gift: I take particular pleasure in growth and life's lessons. I’m an eternal student, so I am constantly transforming, evolving, and seeking a deeper relationship.
The Opportunity: Although I seek God’s love, sometimes I run from it. God is light, the fear of His Energy Star CFLs rated bulb shining on all of the things that are defaced or concealed in me brings realness to my conscience and how I perceive things. {This is a whole ‘notha post} The point: To have God become closer to me has meant facing up to the things about me I don’t like or want to see.
Love
The Gift: I don’t like to brag, so I won’t.
The Opportunity: Learning to receive. We can define, debate, quote, reminisce and site examples of what a four letter word beginning with L and ending in E is or should be, but if we are not open to receive. Null.
*The Close* I can be emotional to the point of irrationality at one moment, and logical the next. How to blend my head and heart is a constant struggle. Moodiness {It’s complicated … my tendency to over analyze can give the the appearance of emotional detachment} and an extremely subjective nature makes me prone to hypersensitivity, which usually has to do with the fact that I take in so much from my environment. ☚That gives you Mr.TramueL’s Observations. Which takes us back up top & starts the writing process.
Mr. “I took time out to really emote and understand my own thoughts & may end up baffling others” TramueL
